Absolution and vanishing superfoods

Weird unbloggable things were happening to my body round about Christmas, and the doctor put me in for a few tests. Didn’t say what they were testing for exactly. When I looked up what it said on the appointment letters (words that even the GP receptionist struggled to pronounce), there were big arrows pointing at cancer. Long story short, two months later they’ve declared me as cancer-free as the next person. Something in a scan looked like a growth, but now it’s gone. One test to go, or maybe they’ll let me off without doing that one, for good behaviour. So anyway, not an experience I’m in a hurry to repeat. I’m no health freak, but in recent weeks I’ve popped into Holland & Barrett and tried (and failed) to decode their product range. I’ve even wondered if there’s a tasty superfood you can snack on to ward off cancer. But the only snack superfood I discovered is Maple and Pecan biscuits. Here’s their superpower – they spontaneously vanish from unopened packets. Mmmm.